❄️ Are you Frozen too? ❄️

areyoufrozentooperfectionism

One of the great joys of having young kids in the family is letting our own inner child come out to play. With the recent release of Frozen II in theaters, we thought this was the perfect time to relate this to being frozen in our own lives. Elsa the Snow Queen’s super-power is turning objects and people to ice. She can build icy bridges, stop an attack, and probably make ice cream whenever she wants (lucky). But her power has to be controlled. And while Elsa freezes things, we often freeze ourselves.

How we ‘Freeze’ ourselves

How do you relate with being frozen? In what area of life are you stuck? It could be around starting an exercise regimen, decluttering the basement or guest room, addressing the issues in your relationships, writing the book, updating the resume or asking for a raise. It could be in the area of health improvement, where we want to lose weight or become more plant-based, but we just can’t seem to begin or sustain our progress.

And because we are frozen, we just find ways to feel better about it. Sometimes we distract ourselves. Have you ever needed to study for a test and then looked at the messy state of your room and thought to yourself, “there’s no ways I can study in this environment”and then spent your study time detail-cleaning the room? We may distract ourselves with lounging in front of the TV, or spending hours on Facebook or Instagram. Numbing out with sugar, caffeine, smoking, or alcohol are also ways we try to make ourselves feel better about being frozen.

What makes this even worse is we put a layer of shame frosting on top. We start belittling ourselves and ‘wishing’ we were better. “Argh,” we think as we get up from the couch after 4 hours of watching Gypsy Sisters or Netflixing World War II documentaries, “I wish I had more motivation to have exercised today” or “I should have cleaned out the downstairs closet, it’s such a mess.”

Perhaps you can relate to unachieved goals, shame storms, and numbing out. Have you ever wondered what lies beneath?

What causes us to be Frozen

In a word: perfectionism. It sounds kind of beautiful, but it’s actually one of the worst words because of the meaning and effect it has in our lives.

It’s hard to say where our perfectionism comes from, but if you’ve ever grown up hearing someone say to you, “If you can’t do it right; don’t do it at all!,” that could be part of the origin. In essence, we are told that our actions, and even who we are, aren’t worthy unless perfect. What a toxic message to carry around with us in our lives.

Perfectionism tends to either paralyze us into inaction or cause us to go overboard and, consequently, burn out.

Why even start to clean the guest bedroom if we can’t do it ‘perfectly’ and we don’t have the five hours we believe it will take? Well, because you CAN make progress, even with 15 minutes of removing trash, clutter, and boxes. 

Perfectionism with our food usually looks like following a certain diet for a few days or weeks, then falling off the wagon and eating everything in sight. There’s an anti-dote to this that allows for sustainable weight loss; chat with us and find out more.

In short, perfectionism usually causes us to procrastinate, get overwhelmed, and shut-down or ‘freeze’.

What’s the cost of perfectionism? The cost is not getting things done at all, whereas we could have made progress. The cost is our inner peace; we don’t feel at peace when we feel stressed and frustrated by not having the time or ability to do something perfectly. Perfectionism can cost our relationships with other people. If you’ve ever yelled at a child or spouse because of a small mess or because they aren’t cleaning the ‘right’ way (your way) you can see the effect your perfectionism and words have on others. Also, and this is two-fold, if you value keeping your home environment museum-perfect over having your ‘messy’ grandchildren visit or if you feel like you can’t have visitors due to a messy, cluttered environment, your relationships with others will suffer.

Check yourself: next time you find yourself frustrated or overwhelmed by a challenge, look underneath that feeling to see if perfectionism is the undercurrent.

How to get Un-frozen

The power of un-freezing ourselves comes from realizing that progress > perfection. Initially, your belief in that statement will recoil. How could progress be better than that which is perfect? Well, considering the high costs and knowing something will never, ever truly be perfect….progress starts looking really good, right? Excellence, according to dictionary definition is, “the quality of being outstanding or extremely good.” If excellence means that we can take action, feel good about ourselves, and not get stuck, why would anyone choose perfectionism instead? 

A small step, taken consistently and continuously reaching toward our goal is better than no action at all. Perhaps you remember My 30-minute Morning Routine about how many people create obstacles for themselves to workout when 6 minutes of strength-training in your own home can still help you feel better and see results. But if you don’t learn to change your way of thinking, perfectionism will keep you hog-tied and frozen.

In Frozen II, Elsa’s sister, Anna, seems to display and embody more of the element – fire – in this movie. Here’s where we have an answer to thawing ourselves out and taking action. Fire motivates, it stirs passion, and, if uncontrolled, it will burn everything in its path. So the key here is to find your motivation and use it as the fire to propel you towards your goals, but without going overboard and burning out.

Motivation isn’t usually enough though, so consider other ‘hacks’ such as scheduling your workout. The 4 Tips to Fit in Fitness blog is a great place to start. When it comes to decluttering, check out our experience with the Konmari Method for inspiration and ideas to make it easier.

Want to write a book? Just start writing, imperfectly. A typo is not the end of the world; besides, there are opportunities to review and make edits (or have others do it!). Allowing perfectionism to rule in this area of your life means your story is never shared, in-print or online.

What’s one area of your life where you’re willing to become ‘unfrozen’ and warm up your ‘fire’ to take action?

Tough Love Tuesday

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A long-time close friend would often ask, after patiently listening to a litany of drama in a person’s life, “are you ready for some tough love?” And either the individual braced for it and cautiously replied, “sure” or, in a rare case, would demur.

Sometimes we aren’t willing or ready to hear the hard truths of a situation. Our health is no exception.

According to the Center for Disease Control’s 2016 data, the top causes of death in the United States include: heart disease, cancer, accidents (unintentional injuries), chronic lower respiratory diseases, and stroke (cerebrovascular diseases). With the majority of these causes of mortality being preventable by abstaining from smoking, eating well, and engaging in regular physical activity, we don’t really have much of a real excuse.

A lot of us outsource our responsibility to doctors and the pills and surgeries recommended, without asking how we can take ownership of the only house we’ll live in for the rest of our lives.

It’s like going to a mechanic when something is wrong with your automobile and finding out the problems you’re paying for now exist because you had neglected to do the proper maintenance for years. You had the best of intentions, but it just never got done. So the mechanic does the repairs and you pay for them, but if you keep essentially mistreating the car by ‘feeding’ it incorrectly and neglecting the early signs and symptoms of an issue, problems will re-appear and persist. Now who is at fault, and with whom does the responsibility lie – the mechanic or the car’s owner?

It’s not a pretty truth. Humans are all so very good at being able give advice to others. We all can parrot off a small list of ideas on how others can improve their health, and we are quick to share parenting tips with other parents, to ‘fix’ our friends’ issues with their relationships…but do we even take our own advice? What is the disconnect between us KNOWING what we need to do to have good health and then us DOING it? It is often due to us rationalizing the problem and blaming it on external circumstances. “I should eat dinner at home…that healthy recipe I planned, but I got out of work late and there’s a pizza place right here….”

Unlike replaceable cars, our bodies are the only vehicle we have to take us through our entire lives and many of us skip over the boring, daily maintenance including eating nourishing meals, getting exercise, and flossing.

Once you allow the reality of the above statement to sink in, you may find yourself a bit unsettled, even angry. Many people feel stuck, unsure of where to start in trying to make health improvements. The enormity of the problem hangs before us and the temptation is to ‘numb out’ with some ice cream. “We’ll figure it out tomorrow”, we say to ourselves, “let’s just have a bit of distraction and calm down”. We want to avoid the truth because the truth would require us to change.

We don’t know what steps to take, or how to do it…we’re afraid of failing. The fear, combined with our lack of know-how, often combine and we start to shut down and seek a comfortably numb existence…through denial and/or through a pint of Ben and Jerry’s. Some of us retreat to a fantasy world where WE will never have a heart attack (despite indications in our lab values or family history telling us otherwise). Our secret wish is that ‘modern medicine’ will save us from our decades of poor food choices and sedentary lives.

One way or another, reality catches us. We gain 10, 20, 30 pounds or more; we receive a diabetes or another unsettling diagnosis from the doctor. Often times, we’ve seen the train coming, but it was far off enough that we continued playing on the tracks.

An example of this is a client who came in with diabetes type II; the client acknowledged years of blood sugar issues (and a family history), but since they didn’t have diabetes YET, they continued to eat the sweets as they pleased.

There is a silver lining: your empowerment begins when you face the reality of your situation. It involves admitting that you’ve gained an extra 25lbs and that it’s negatively affecting your health and your life. Change begins when you acknowledge the truth first.

What’s a health issue you are tolerating right now? What area of your wellness are you reluctant to shine a light on? Is it extra weight around your mid-section, poor sleep, high lab values, loneliness?

Step 1. Leave denial and step into reality; have courage in telling the truth (whether it’s admitting it to yourself or a trusted friend) and let the healing begin.

Step 2. Gather support. It’s easy to let yourself become overwhelmed with worry or how you’ll need to improve your situation. Gather emotional and practical support as you process your feelings; enlist the knowledgeable assistance you need. This could be a call to your doctor, therapist and meeting with an expert registered dietitian-nutritionist.

You cannot outsource your health, but you can find people to assist you and guide you on your journey. The sage advice of a compassionate healthcare provider can help you turn things around so you can confidently move forward.

Start with a complimentary 20-minute Discovery Call to share your health concerns, goals, and learn how we’ll work together to achieve a higher level of wellness.

Film Review: Food Evolution – Pro-Science or Pro-GMO?

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Photo source: foodevolutionmovie.com

Film Review: Food Evolution

By Adrienne Raimo, RDN

Description: The film Food Evolution asserts that genetically modified organisms (GMOs), despite a controversial reputation, are a safe and intelligent solution to feeding an over-populated world.

Synopsis: Through his film, Food Evolution, the director aims to furnish some answers to the questions of how the science behind GMOs might be used to feed the earth’s growing population. While portraying those concerned about the health and environmental impacts of GMOs as misinformed and fear-mongering, he champions the developments of certain GMO foods as a way to improve crop resistance to disease and drought. The film tries to assume an objective, evidence-based analysis of the science behind GMOs as a safe and reasonable solution for looming issues of food security and sustainability as well as environmental health.

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Bad to the Bone- 6 Tips to Prevent Osteoporosis.

photo source & permission from:  American Recall Center

photo source & permission from: American Recall Center

Osteoporosis is a ‘silent’ disease in which the bones become weak and brittle; unfortunately, it usually only becomes evident when one fractures a bone. One reason why it is paramount to avoid such fractures is because it can involve surgical replacements that can be defective and cause needless pain. It’s better to protect yourself by learning about risk factors and making diet and lifestyle changes.

The disease has quite a few risk factors:

  • being female
  • age, older age increases risk of osteoporosis
  • family history of osteoporosis and/or fractures
  • having a small, thin body frame
  • being caucasian or asian puts one at higher risk
  • low estrogen for women, low testosterone for men
  • having an eating disorder such as anorexia nervosa
  • poor diet & lifestyle habits
  • certain medications can increase risk of osteoporosis
  • lack of exercise

Here are 6 tips you can follow to help protect yourself against the disease and healthily age:

1. Eat your greens! Leafy vegetables such as kale, spinach, and swisschard are packed with bone-building calcium and vitamin K. Try some spinach in your morning smoothie or mustard greens chopped up in your favorite chili.

2. Avoid smoking & drinking alcohol – both are detrimental to general health and to your bones.

3. Get your vitamin D. This nutrient helps calcium’s absorption in the body, preventing your bones from being fragile or misshapen (think rickets). Even a small amount of sun exposure a few times a week can help your body produce vitamin D, according to the National Institutes of Health. During the winter months, consider a high-quality vitamin D supplement.

4. Kick soda to the (trash) can! You know that cola is detrimental to your teeth, but it can also harm your bones. Studies have suggested a link between soda and lower bone density. Some experts accuse the phosphoric acid in cola being responsible for leaching calcium from bones. Others say caffeine can lower the absorptive capacity of calcium. In any case, it’s best to focus on hydrating yourself with water.

5. Eat more nuts! Not only do nuts contain healthy fat, they also contain the calcium and protein essential for strong bones. Protein deficiency, particularly in older adults, can also cause a loss of bone mass. Consider adding in almonds, walnuts, pistachios and some Brazil nuts.

6. Body movement builds bones! Strength-training can assist you in building muscle, losing weight, and creating stronger bones. A gym membership isn’t required for walking, jogging, push-ups, squats, or climbing stairs – so feel free to incorporate this into your daily life and in your home. With these weight-bearing exercises you can strengthen your bone tissue and maintain bone density. Additionally, exercising can help with balance and coordination both of which can prevent falls and fractures.

Remember, we start losing bone mass in our early 30s so do your best to create a strong, osteoporosis-free future!

How to Reduce Free Radical Exposure

photo source: prixray.com

photo source: prixray.com

Free radicals cause oxidative damage & change DNA structure of the cells in the body. Part of this is due to our daily natural cell functioning; however, quite a bit can come from external toxins.

How to reduce free radicals and cellular oxidation

Avoid smoking and exposure
Reducing exposure to x-rays
Avoid tanning beds or over-exposure to the sun
Wear a protective mask around chemicals & other air pollutants
Reduce grilling of foods
Limit and/or avoid alcohol consumption

It can be difficult to avoid many of these external free radicals, be conscious of avoiding what sources you can and remember the importance of eating a rainbow of antioxidants in your everyday eating habits.

4 Quick Tips for Eye Health

Classical spectacle on eye chart

It is imperative to protect the eyes starting as young as possible. Nutrition has a large role to play in protecting eyes from disease; these lifestyle changes can also make a difference:

  • Get regular eye examinations
  • Avoid smoking
  • Protect your eyes from UV rays
  • Employ stress-reduction techniques

Age-related macular degeneration is the leading cause of blindness among older adults in the developed countries. Macular degeneration is linked to free radicals and homocysteine levels. The passionate work of One Bite Wellness revolves around identifying genetic markers, creating a customized nutrition plan, including more antioxidants and regulating homocysteine levels, and deep-cleaning diets in a way that allows clients to experience a delicious and sustainable manner of eating.